


Touch

by Kat92



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 21:52:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 24,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7908910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kat92/pseuds/Kat92
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the northern mountains of the Enchanted Forest, there is a haunted castle, said to house the ghost of an evil witch. When a thief is on his way home, he is forced by a storm to take shelter in the castle and coming face to face with the ghost. But things are not as the locals might think.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The rain was coming down in buckets, threatening to drown the small village, while the wind was trying to pull trees from the ground, roots and all. Or so it had seemed to Robin, as he was riding from one village to this. The way here had been a struggle, which was why he was now sitting in the village tavern, considering staying put for the night. But as he sat, drinking a mug of warm cider, the wind seemed lighter, as it rushed around the houses outside. Maybe it was just that he wanted to get as close to home, as he could before dark, that made it so. But he thought the storm was easing up. His original plan, entering the tavern had been to spend the night there. He had thought that the weather was too bad to keep riding, but now he wasn’t so sure. With the storms he had seen in his past, this at most would qualify as a bit of rain.

“Are you going back out?” The barkeep asked in his thick northern accent.

“I might” Robin shrugged shortly, before drinking more of the cider. It was good, considering the poor state of the tavern. To be honest, Robin would have been willing to drink anything at the moment, as long as it was warm. He was already soaked to the bone and exhausted from the long ride. He still had at least a couple more days to go, but he wanted to get as far as he could in one day. And it was still light out.

It was autumn now and the days were getting colder as well as wetter and shorter. Living as a thief was so much easier during the summer, when you could just sleep under the stars and not worry too much about shelter. But as soon as the cold sat in, it got a lot tougher. Robin’s group of outlaws had grown over the summer, the latest addition had been a mother and her toddler daughter. And of course there was his own son too. Now, Robin could deal with the cold of living in a poorly structured shelter, over the winter. But he would not see his boy, or any of the children for that matter, go cold or hungry. And that was the point of his quest, to find a place for them to spend the winter. 

It hadn’t been easy and he had had to travel further than he thought, no one in their local area would put up such a big flock. Or they just didn’t want to risk anyone finding out, they would hang for it, if anyone did. So Robin rode north for three days, hoping that that would be enough to find a place where no one knew them and therefore a place for them to hide. At the same time, he had sent a man east, one south, and one west. That way, hopefully they would find a good spot for them.

The barkeep shook his head at him. “You’d be crazy to go back out into that, doesn’t look like it’ll end soon”

“I have to get home and there’s still daylight to spend – how far is it to the next village?”

“An hour by horse, maybe two in this weather – but you won’t make it that far”

“And there’s nothing in between?”

The barkeep looked as if he was thinking about it. “Nothing that I can think of – except for the castle of course, but no one goes there, so it’s pretty run down. And people say it’s haunted”

“Haunted? “ Robin asked skeptically “By what?”

“Well” The barkeep leaned against the bar, leaning in towards him, like whatever haunted the castle was a secret. Robin got the feeling that this wasn’t the first time this man had told the story. “There are many different versions of the story. But legend has it that many years ago, there lived an evil witch in the castle. And she wasn’t just any evil witch, she was the most evil witch there has ever been. She killed many people and even cursed her own daughter. Some say she ripped the heart out of her son’s chest and crushed it with her bare hands. In the end though, somebody managed to imprison her in the castle. Don’t know how they did it, but that’s what the legend says.”

“And she’s still alive then?” He had to say, the accent, the weather and the tone with which he spoke, made it all sound very convincing. But Robin was still sure that it was just a scary story.

“No no, she died many years ago, but they say she still haunts the castle and rips out the heart of anyone who tries to enter.”

Right – could ghosts even do that? In any case, Robin was not convinced, it sounded more like an oldwife’s tale than a true story.

“In any case, you’re better off staying here”

He couldn’t tell if he said that out of true concern, or just to make more money from him. Probably the latter. Robin finished his cider and took a moment or two to think about whether or not he should risk going out in that weather again. “I appreciate the concern, but I think I’ll risk it” He put a few coins on the counter, before getting up. All the while wondering if he was insane or not.

An hour later, when he was back on his horse and out in the rain, Robin decided that he was most definitely insane. The storm was much worse than he had predicted. Apparently the little village had been sheltered by the surrounding mountains, making the storm seem weaker than it was. Because now Robin was having trouble staying on the horse, because the wind was so violent. Not to mention the fact that he had lost all feeling in his fingers and toes minutes after he left the village. So holding on to the reins was quite difficult.

The progress they were making, was slow at best. In the end Robin had to get off and walk beside the horse, leaning into the wind and dragging the horse with him. This wouldn’t do, at this rate he wouldn’t reach the next village until hours after it had gotten dark. And right now he wasn’t sure he could keep going for more than another ten minutes. If he hadn’t been exhausted when he was in the tavern, he certainly was now.

“Come on boy, just a bit further” Robin urged the horse on, maybe just as much to keep himself going. There had to be a place with shelter somewhere, anywhere that was out of the wind and the rain would be more than fine right now.

Just when Robin was about to give up, he spotted a path off of the road. Something that used to be a proper road, if the remains of gravel was anything to go by. But it was now overgrown with grass and other weeds. It clearly hadn’t been used in a long while. But it had to lead somewhere, somewhere run down or some remains of a house, but still some kind of building. Anywhere that could give shelter for a while. Robin could sleep just about anywhere, but he was getting too cold, falling asleep outside would not be a good idea.

He turned down the path and within five minutes small castle came into sight. Small only by comparison with other castles he had seen of course, there was nothing small about this, compared to a house or the tavern he had just visited. It was surrounded by a moat, obviously meant to be impossibly to besiege. He stopped and looked at his horse, as if he was asking it for advice, when he realized that this had to be the castle the barkeep had been talking about. “Well, it’s either this or sleeping under a tree”

He still wasn’t sure if he believed the story or not, but if it was true, the ghost would be ripping out his heart and it wasn’t exactly something he would risk lightly. But if it wasn’t true, then there was a perfectly good place where he could rest and warm up. It might not be warm in there, but at least it would be out of the wind and the rain.

The castle had its only little village next to it. There wasn’t much more than 10 houses, so Robin supposed it was more a gathering of houses, than an actual village. Houses for the people who worked at the castle, in its heyday. People like blacksmiths and carpenters who were needed at the castle, but not important enough to have a room in the building. All the houses were outside of the moat, including the stables. There wasn’t even much of a garden around the castle. Considering it had been someone’s prison that seemed appropriate.

The houses weren’t much to look at, pretty much just ruins of what they had been. But the stables were massive and had held up better to time, then the rest of the houses. There were still holes in the roof in most places and a few spots where the walls were caving in. But Robin managed to find a stall by the end, where the walls were still whole and the roof was too. The stall was bare, not a scrap of hay in sight, but it would have to do. If Arthur, the horse, got hungry, he could always eat the weeds that were coming up through the cobblestone floor. Once he was settled in and out of the saddle and bridle, Robin left the stable and headed to the moat.

The drawbridge was down, although there wasn’t much of a bridge left. Most of the boards that went across it, were broken down or gone entirely. Robin wasn’t even sure if it would hold his weight, but it did. The wind threatened to blow him off it a few times, but before he knew it, he was on the other side. Maybe he should be turning back, but he had come this far already, turning back now would be foolish. Besides, there was a perfectly good shelter just ahead, why should he settle for a drafty stable, when he might even be able to have a fire and dry off. Looking around, his blue eyes didn’t land on anything too ominous. So he tried to shake off whatever fear he still had and stepped into the courtyard of the castle. There wasn’t much to see, except for the tall walls of the building, the cobblestone ground and a few statues, that time had taken its toll on, making them basically unrecognizable. The only thing he could imagine had been just relatively brightening in the dim courtyard, was the, now dead, tree in the center of it. The branches of it had broken off and were scattered around the courtyard. Only about 2 or 3 feet of the trunk were left standing. It truly was a sad sight, but Robin didn’t stay to look at it for too long. Instead he walked across the courtyard and entered the castle.

It should have felt nice, being out of the wind and the rain. The door stayed on its hinges, barely, but when it closed, instead of feeling relief, Robin only felt dread. The castle was dark and gloomy, everything was covered in dust. You would think that people, like himself, would have robbed the place years ago, but no one seemed to have. Instead time had passed and left its trace on everything. Whether that was mold or moth, making furniture as well as carpets and paintings, slowly fall apart, or just the thick layer of dust that seemed only to have been disturbed by bugs, mice and rats for a very long time.

The feeling of intruding was not new to Robin, but it felt different here. This was an abandoned place, it felt empty, dead even. It felt more like stepping on someone’s grave than breaking into their home.

Robin could have left this place a very rich man, but instead he was more in favor of finding the nearest fireplace, start a fire and get some sleep. In the morning, he’d leave as fast as he could. Thankfully there was a fireplace in the hallway, which was the first room he entered. It was a big room, with doors leading to other rooms on either sides, and a double staircase opposite the entry. Despite the castle being build of grey stones and the interior was the same, Robin could still imagine that it had looked grand, back in the day. But in this gloomy light it just looked sad and abandoned.

There was already wood in the hallway fireplace, very dry and partially eaten up by bugs, but still plenty left to burn. As was the wood stacked in a small pile beside the fireplace. It took very little kindling to make it light up and bless Robin with its sweet, sweet heat. Moving one of the more sturdy chairs closer to the fire, Robin took off his cloak and hung it over the back of it, to dry it off.

Stacking more wood on the fire, Robin sat down close to it, letting the heat seep through his bones and warm him back up. It wasn’t until he stopped shaking, that he realized that he had been. He got the feeling back in his fingers and toes and started praying that he wouldn’t end up sick from this. As his body warmed, it relaxed and his eyes started to droop. He wasn’t planning to go anywhere and there was very little hope of finding any food here, so he was quite content to let sleep claim him, right then and there.

When he opened his eyes again, the room had been transformed. Light was streaming in through the windows and there was not a speck of dust in sight. The furniture all looked new and sturdy, but there was no color. Even the paintings, that he was sure had had colors under the dust before, were now just black and white. As Robin got up from the floor, he noticed that his clothes were dry again, but the fire was still going, in fact it looked bigger now than it had been before. Frowning confused, Robin dusted off his pants, although there was a lot less dust than there should have been.

“Hello?”

Looking around, Robin couldn’t see anyone, but as he stepped towards the center of the room, he spotted a person in a doorway. It wasn’t until she stepped into the room, that Robin could see that it was a woman. A very beautiful one at that – was this the ghost? She surely looked the part in this colorless place, with her long white nightgown and long, loose, dark hair. “Hello” He greeted, clearly intrigued more than afraid, as he stepped towards her. Unlike him, she seemed if not frightened, then concerned, as she took a step backwards, away from him as he stepped closer.

“What are you doing here?” She asked, Robin stopped, when she stepped away from him, so that the distance between them was maintained. “Taking shelter from the storm” He replied “I fell asleep by the fire” But how things had come to look like this in the time he had been asleep, he did not know. Perhaps the place really was cursed.

Her features curled into a confused frown “Storm?” She looked to the window and Robin followed her gaze. There was light coming in from them alright, but there was nothing to see outside of them. Nothing but a white foggy mass. Robin frowned as well, before he turned around and headed for the door in long quick steps. Outside the sky looked the same as the light in the window and when he faced the opening in the wall that led to the drawbridge, the bridge was gone and so was everything on the other side. All had been replaced by the strange white fog. He was trapped. “What is this place?” He whispered, slowly stepping towards the edge of what seemed to be left of the castle.

“My prison” she replied quietly. Robin hadn’t even realized that she had followed him, until she spoke. He glanced back at her, before reaching out into the fog, completely ignoring her instruction of “Be careful”, before he was hit by some form of power and thrown back, landing ass first on the ground.

She stood only a couple of feet away from him as he got up, rubbing his backside. “I’m fine” He assured her, as if she would actually care. The woman just rolled her eyes at him “I did warn you”

“You could have stopped me”

“No, I couldn’t. We can’t touch”

“We- what?” he turned to look at her, still frowning.

“I haven’t had many visitors here, but that much I do know. We can’t touch – we just can’t”

Robin still wasn’t giving up the frown, what was this place and why was he here? And why was she here? “What happens if we does? The same thing as the –“ He gestured to the whiteness behind him, looking for the right word for it “fog?”

“Not.. exactly” She sighed and stepped closer to him, before she reached out to touch his shoulder. But as her hand was supposed to connect with his clothing, it just went right through him, he didn’t even feel it. When he reached out to try and touch her, the same thing happened, his hand went right through her. Well, this place just got more odd by the second, but at least that meant she couldn’t rip his heart out .. right?

“What is this place?” He asked again. Was he trapped here now? Was this the curse? Would he ever see his son again? Panic crept into his heart as his eyes searched her stunning features for an answer. He hadn’t failed to notice her beauty, even in this colorless place, but at the moment he did have other things on his mind.

She seemed to hesitate with her reply, but as she looked at him, she seemed to soften and decide to answer his question. “It is the curse of this place .. my curse” She crossed her arms over her torso, with a far away look in her dark eyes. “You’re still asleep” She said, looking back at him. “You will be out of here as soon as you wake up”

“I’m asleep?” She nodded and Robin looked back at the fog “But.. I felt that, I know I did. It hurt” When he looked to her again she shrugged “Part of the curse, you can feel it all, but it doesn’t hurt you. You could jump off the roof or try to hang yourself in the tree, it would hurt, but you wouldn’t die” Robin frowned as she spoke, not because he was confused anymore, surprisingly this was starting to make sense to him. But because she sounded a lot like she had tried her suggestions. What could possibly have driven her to that? Why would she want to kill herself? “How long have you been here?” He couldn’t say why, but he was worried about her, if she had tried to kill herself, she would have to have been trapped here a long time.

“I don’t know. It’s never night here, I have no idea how much time has passed. But many many years” She looked around the courtyard for a moment, it wasn’t until then that Robin noticed that the tree was now fully grown, alive and blossoming. When she looked at him again, she shrugged “I haven’t had many visitors, you are only the second.”

Now he truly felt sorry for her, he already felt trapped here, he couldn’t imagine what it would be like if he had been stuck here for years. “Well, I’m honored” he quipped in an attempt to make her smile. It almost worked, at least he was certain that he saw a slight curl in the corner of her mouth, but it was only a flash of it. But at least it was something and Robin wasn’t one to back down from a challenge. “Who was the first?”

“My stepdaughter” She replied with a frown – not a healthy relationship, he assumed. “I can tell you that time here, doesn’t pass like it does in dreams. It passes like it does when you’re awake… It was a very long night”

“I’m sorry” he smirked a bit, which seemed to rub off on her, no matter how much she might try to fight it. “Well, let’s just hope you’re better company – you might be here a while”

“I promise I’ll do my best” He replied. Knowing that he would only be here for as long as he was asleep, took away his worries for his own safety. Now it was her that he was more focused on. If she was really trapped here and had been for as long as it seemed, he ought to try and make his time with her a pleasant one.

“I am Robin and I apologize for invading your .. home”

“Prison” She corrected him. “I am Regina”

“Regina, a beautiful name. Very .. royal” He smiled at her, wondering why he was flirting with a woman he couldn’t even touch and who, for all he knew, really might just be a ghost.

“Indeed” She raised a slender eyebrow in his direction. As if hinting that he was going in the right direction. “No?”

“Yes” Of course, no one that stunning was a lowlife like himself. If he tried, he could easily imagine her in rich gowns and in a castle far more grand than this one, even as she stood in front of him, in what he assumed was a night gown. “Queen?”

She nodded, hint of a smile on her lips. “And you?” Oh – well, that was awkward. Suddenly he was wishing that he had never asked and just pretended that he didn’t notice her hint. Then they could just be equals, but now. Now she was above him, not that she acted as such. But for all she knew, he was a knight who had come to save her. If only he could, but this had to be some very advanced magic to keep her trapped like this. There was very little hope that he would be able to break whatever curse this was. “Eh.. “ Robin scratched his neck, trying to think of something he could do to stall her.

“Indulge me. I haven’t seen another person in years.. Besides, I can’t hurt you even if I wanted to and you will be out of here as soon as you wake up” He supposed that was true, but still. Telling her could make the next long while very awkward. But then he thought of going years without seeing another human being. He would more than likely go mad, especially if he was kept here. How she was still making sense, was beyond him. But, like she said, he would only be here for as long as he was asleep. She might be here for even more years. Would it kill him to indulge her? No, definitely not. “I’m .. a thief”

Whatever hint of a smile had been on her lips disappeared, replaced by a stern frown, as she crossed her arms across her chest again. “Here to rob me”

“No – No, I swear. I was trying to make it to the next village, but the storm was too bad so.. I snug into your castle and lit a fire, that’s all. And so you know, it doesn’t look like anyone has robbed you – yet” His words seemed to soften her frown, but he supposed she didn’t have much choice than to believe him. It wasn’t like she could check if he was telling the truth. “I’m trying to get back to my son. I’m not here to rob you” To be honest, if he hadn’t met her, he might have come back later to rob the place. But now.. he didn’t want to take anymore from her, than what she had already lost. Of course he didn’t know what exactly she had lost, besides her freedom and many years of her life. Leaving family and loved ones behind. No, she had definitely lost enough.

Regina turned and gestured for him to follow her, as she turned and walked back inside. “Back to your son? .. from where?” They seemed to have gone from the most important questions to just making smalltalk. If that was how she’d like to spend the time, he could certainly oblige. “I was looking for shelter for my … group” He glanced at her, wondering how she’d take that.

“There’s more than one of you?” She asked, smirking a bit. Good, so she wasn’t mad or disgusted. “It’s not what you think. We’re .. fair”

“A fair thief? Now I’ve heard it all” Regina led them back to the fire and to the chairs in front of it. She took a seat in one and Robin took the other. He could feel the warmth from the fire and how the chair moved as he sat down. He still couldn’t believe that this was a dream, it seemed so real. “The current king is … Not a good man, or a fair one, people are starving. The rich are getting richer and the poor are struggling to keep up with the taxes. Me and my group are only trying to even the odds, help those who need it the most” Regina folded up her legs under her and looked to get very comfortable in the chair, as she watched him. There were certainly worse ways to spend the night, Robin thought, than in the company of a beautiful woman who may or may not be a ghost.

“So you’re a hero then..” She smiled a bit again. “I wouldn’t go that far .. I’m simply.. A man with a conscience.”

“If you’re doing as much good as I think you are, you a definitely a hero” He could feel her eyes on him, even as he looked away. He hadn’t always been this way, before things got this bad, before his son, he had been selfish and stolen things just for himself. Never much more than he could spend, but he stole instead of doing an honest day’s work. If he needed new clothes he would just steal more. Not an honorable life, that was for sure. Robin would never call himself a hero. “But you said you were looking for shelter .. from what?” Regina asked, cutting of his train of thought.

“Winter” he answered simply. “It’s winter?” Robin realized that if time didn’t pass here, it would mean that she wouldn’t even know what time of year it was. He remembered the tree in the courtyard and how it had been in bloom. How many years had she been stuck here?

“It’s autumn, winter will be here soon..” She nodded silently, thinking god knows what. To repay the favor of distraction, he continued “We’ve been living in the forest over the summer, moving from place to place every time we thought the king’s men had found our hiding place. But there are children in my group. Including my own son and they can’t spent a winter in a camp. We don’t have much food and adding the cold might be fatal for them. So we’re looking for somewhere to hide. Somewhere hidden, preferably cheap, or.. “ Robin looked around as an idea dawned on him “haunted – somewhere people wouldn’t come looking voluntarily”

It was brilliant really, hiding in plain sight. Or well, it was still far from their current camp, but no one would think that anyone would live in a haunted castle. Right? But then he thought of its current state. It needed a lot of work before it would be able to work for them. But then, if they fixed the bridge, they might even be able to keep the king’s men out, should they ever find them. It could truly be a safe place for them. At least over the winter. “I thought you weren’t going to rob my home”

“I’m – we’re not.. I just thought we might .. occupy it for a while. Just until spring, until I can make sure the children are healthy and it’s safer to sleep under the open sky.” She didn’t look happy about the idea and he couldn’t exactly blame her. This might be her prison, but if it was the place she had stayed for so long, it had to be a home for her too. Of course she didn’t want a band of thieves to invade that. “I don’t know how this.. curse works, but isn’t it possible, that if I stayed here, that I would visit you every night?”

“I suppose” She said, seeming like she was thinking about it. He hoped that having company one a regular basis, would be a good thing. Unless she found him annoying, or didn’t want a thief hanging around her.  

“You would be doing me a great favor, but it is your choice. You’re in charge, my queen” Okay, so maybe that was layering it on a bit thick. But for the possibility of staying in a place this sturdy, Robin was willing to put on his best charms. It seemed to work though, as she fought to kill a charmed smile.

“Even if I didn’t want you to come here, it’s not like I could stop you” he supposed that was true. “Except I’d have to face a very cross you every night, and I don’t think that would be very fun for either of us.”

“But wouldn’t it be worth it? For you I mean” he thought about that for a moment, looking into the strange black and white fire. “Yes” It would and there was no point in lying. This place might need a bit of work, but it was the best place he’d find before winter really kicked in. “But I’m sure we can find somewhere else, where we wouldn’t be stepping on any toes.”

“You’d do that? Risk your son, just so you wouldn’t ‘step on my toes’?” Robin shrugged “It’s your hom – Prison” He remembered to correct himself, before she did.

Regina frowned at that and pulled her legs up under her chin, looking into the fire. “It doesn’t look like I’ll be escaping any time soon, you need a place to stay and .. well, your company isn’t as appalling as .. some” Robin grinned at that, he supposed that was a compliment. But she wasn’t smiling, even as she glanced at him.

“It’s not that I wouldn’t love to have a bunch of thieves in my .. prison. It’s just .. I’ve been alone for so long, I’m used to it now. I’m not sure having company would make this curse easier or .. not”

“Oh ..” Robin had only thought about how it could be when he was there. But what about during the day? And would it make it worse, if Robin kept her up to date with what was going on outside of her prison, so she knew just what she was missing? He could certainly see how it could make things harder for her, which was the last thing he wanted. “Well I suppose I have a few hours to convince you” He smiled at her, hoping to get a smile back, but it was in vain.

“Apart from the stealing thing, I really am a decent guy. I don’t bite my nails or burp … much” He chuckled, that really wasn’t the way to make himself look good, but it did manage to make her smile, just a little bit. “What else .. uhm.. I’m good with a bow and arrow and horses”

“Me too” She smiled a bit more and it was a beautiful thing. “Bow and arrow?”

“No – horses”

“Ah – well, we have something in common then. Apart from the slightly creepy dreamworld. Too bad you haven’t got any horses here”

“Mmm” Regina agreed, nodding. “It’s just me here, no mice, no rats, no birds. Just me”

“And me” Robin leaned towards her in the chair, almost wishing that he could put a hand on her arm or something, anything to make her feel less alone.

“For now” She locked eyes with him for a moment. “Only if that is how you want it” he replied softly. They fell quiet for a while. Robin didn’t want to push her into deciding or nag her, by continuing to talk. So while she thought, he looked into the fire, leaning back in the chair and stretched out his legs in front of him.

Eventually she sighed and got up from her chair. “Come on. If you are going to live in my castle, I might as well show you around” Robin grinned and got up quickly to follow her.

~*~*~*~

They spend the next hours walking around the castle, while Regina told him what she knew of its history, which wasn’t much. Apparently she hadn’t known anything about the place, before it became her prison. The more she showed him of the place, the surer he got that this would be an excellent hideout. Of course he didn’t know the actual state of the place, but he could check that out in the morning, before he left. There was only one room that she asked they didn’t enter. Her bedroom. She didn’t say why, even when he asked. But it was the one thing that she was unwavering on. Other than that, she didn’t give him any instructions, other than asking that they didn’t touch the painting of her father, that hung over the fireplace in the library. It seemed more than fair, even her wish that no one entered her bedroom. So Robin agreed of course and when he did, she allowed him and his group to take shelter in the castle.

“Are you sure there’s nothing I can do to repay you?” Robin asked as Regina led the way back into the library. When they were there before, Robin had spotted a chessboard. It seemed that he could touch and move objects like in the real world, it was only her that he couldn’t touch. And of course that was already getting on his nerves, making her the only thing he wanted to touch. “Go to bed early? Sleep in late?” She asked with a crooked smile, as she took a seat on one side of the chessboard.

Robin smiled back, sitting down opposite her. “I’ll do my best, but I do have a four year old, sleeping in is a rare thing. Early nights I might be able to do.”

“That’s fair” She nodded, before gesturing at the chessboard “You start”

Robin had never been the best at chess, it was too much sitting down and sitting still. Plus he was more a brawns than brains person. Not that he was stupid, but he certainly wasn’t a scholar either. It took three games, before he was anywhere near beating her and even then she won. But he did find that he liked the game, if only because it was a good excuse to sit close to her and be able to study her movements. Maybe it was just the circumstances they had met under, or the fact that he couldn’t touch her. But there was something about her that he couldn’t let go of. He couldn’t imagine waking up in the morning, if he remembered all of this, and not get to see her again. There was more about her that he wanted to know. And he knew, if he didn’t see her again, he would always wonder what would have happened if he did.

In the few hours they had known each other, he already cared about her, he needed to come back. And if he could, he would find a way to save her, from whatever curse was keeping her here.  

“This time I’m going to beat you” Robin said as he made another first move.

“Such confidence” Regina murmured, smirking, before making her own first move.

But when Robin shifted to make another move, he noticed that he could see right thought his hand. He looked to Regina for an answer, only to see the smile fade from her lips. “You’re waking up” She explained. Oh. He hadn’t realized that that much time had passed. That had to be a good thing, that he liked her company that much.

“Come back soon, you still need to beat me at chess”

“I’ll do my best, but it might take me a while to sort out everything and make it back here” Regina didn’t reply but just looked at him with a cheerless look on her face.

“I will be back.. I promise”

“I know, but you get to go..” Robin wanted to reply, to say something to cheer her up. But before he could say anything, he was opening up his eyes to the colorful, but old and dusty castle. Thankfully he did remember every single moment of the night. Although he still didn’t understand most of the how and whys. But right now the how and the why didn’t matter. He had found shelter for his group and more importantly, he had found her. And there was no doubt that he would be back, no matter what shelter the other men might have found for the group. He was the leader after all, he had to have some say. Even if it was just to see her again.

Robin took a while to do a quick walk around the castle, just to check that the roof wasn’t gone anywhere and the walls were still standing. Apparently the castle was of a far more solid build than the houses on the grounds. Making it back to the hallway, he walked towards the door, Robin took a moment to look back into the room. “I will be back” He had no idea if she could hear him, but that didn’t matter, it was a promise and one that he intended to keep. Then he turned and walked outside. The storm had passed and the sky was now blue, in that weather he would be able to get home soon and back even sooner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this was the first chapter, hope you all enjoyed it. 
> 
> In case anyone is interested, the castle Regina is trapped in, looks something like Caerlaverock Castle (Of course not as a ruin - but you get the idea) 
> 
> All feedback would be greatly appreciated <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos guys - you're the best <3

It took longer than Robin would have liked, to convince the others in his camp, that moving to the haunted castle was a good idea. Maybe he shouldn’t have started out with calling it that, but it was how they were going to use it as their hideout. How was he supposed to know that some of the women were superstitious? Then again he was the leader, so maybe he should have known. In any case it took two days to convince the group to move to the castle, another day to pack up their camp and far too long to make it back to the castle.

All in all, it was a week, before Robin was in front of the castle again. The weather was kinder this time, clear blue skies, hardly any wind, but the wind that was there had a biting chill to it. It was a good thing that they had arrived when they did, because if this cold continued, it wouldn’t be long before snow started to fall.

Ever since the castle came into view, there had been excited voices among the group. He had warned them that the place needed some work done, but perhaps he had overdone it. In any case, no one seemed disappointed with what they saw. If anything, they were probably excited by the size of it. And Robin knew everyone was excited about the prospect of living in a castle. It was all Roland had talked about ever since he found out.  

“Can I be a knight daddy?” Roland asked, leaning against the side of the wagon, as Robin’s horse was standing next to it.

Robin chuckled and got off the horse, so he could walk up to him and ruffle his curls. “Of course, my boy, if we can find a suit of armor small enough”  

“Yay!!” The small boy cheered as Robin lifted him off the wagon, followed by the other children.

“You can all be knights and princesses” That evoked more cheering and a laughter from Robin, before he went to help the men get the lumber they had brought, out of another wagon. The bearing beams of the drawbridge would have to do until spring, but they still needed to put new planks across it, so that they could use the bridge until then. They had brought some of the lumber they had used in their previous camp, it should do fine for now.

It was only around noon when they arrived. And everyone put their backs into fixing the most important things, before dark. Like the main entrance door, boarding up any windows that were broken, fixing up the stables and getting some rooms cleaned and dusted. No one more than Robin though and not only did he work hard, he couldn’t stop smiling. And it was noticed too, as he found out at dinner that night.

“What’s wrong with your face?” Will asked as he sat down his food on the floor and sat down in front of Robin. They had made a temporary camp in the front hall, since they hadn’t had time to dust off and clean out more rooms. At the moment, the broken down furniture were being used as firewood. But compared to the camps they had had in the previous nights, it was warm, not to mention dry. Everyone seemed more than happy to spend a night on the floor.

“Pardon?” Robin looked up at him, from his bowl of humble stew.

Will got comfortable on the wooden floor and picked up his own bowl, before he spoke again. “You’ve been smiling all day, it’s not right”

“It’s been a good day” He explained easily, stirring his stew. It was true, today had been a good day. “We have a place to stay for the winter, the best place we’ve had in a long time. Why shouldn’t I be smiling?”

“You smiling at your stew, no one smiles at bloody bowl of stew, mate” Will pointed out, making sure to frown at the stew. It was pretty bland, Robin had to give him that, but right now they could only be happy to get to fill their bellies.

He didn’t reply though, instead he made a point out of grinning more at the other man, before eating another spoonful of the stew.

“Seriously though, what is it about this place? Apart from the shelter and safety and all that. Creeps me out. Did you see that all the mirrors are smashed? Everything else looks like it’s just been left to fall apart, but the mirrors have all been broken. What’s that about?”

Robin shrugged slightly “I don’t know” But the frown on his brow, showed that he wasn’t just brushing it off. Instead he was trying to come up with a reason, for Regina to break all the mirrors in her prison. There was something about her, or maybe more her surroundings, that made him think she had seen her share of heartache and bad times. She hadn’t told him anything, but there had to be some kind of back story, as to why she was locked up here. And there was something in her eyes, something haunted. The way she looked at him, was like she couldn’t quite believe it. Robin didn’t know what ‘it’ was. Maybe it was just that he was there, since she seemed to have been alone for very long. But whatever it was, it went away when she smiled. Then she was just .. beautiful.

“You’re doing it again”

“What?”

“Grinning like an idiot”

“Shut up” Robin didn’t stop though, why should he?

 

~*~*~*~

 

After they finished dinner, it wasn’t long before people were going to sleep. It had been a long day and the previous days on the road had taken its toll on everyone. The hall was more than big enough for all of them and the fireplace gave of a comfortable heat, unlike anything they had had since summer ended. Sleep seemed to take everyone quickly tonight, including Roland, as Robin stuffed his cape snugly around the small boy. His eyes had been drooping as they were eating dinner, by the time Robin was tugging him in, it was the boy’s stubbornness alone that kept him awake. 

“Go to sleep Roland” Robin told him quietly, so he wouldn’t wake any of the men who were already snoring loudly. Not that he could, it would most likely take the whole castle coming down on them, before they would wake. He wondered shortly what Regina would make of them, of all of them. Perhaps she would change her mind and throw them out, or try to anyway. If she was a ghost, she could probably scare them into leaving. Grown men they might be, but most of them were still boys at heart. Men who would wet their pants at the sound of creaking doors, rattling chains, or haunting cries of ghosts.

“But I want to see the ghost” Roland protested, looking up at him with his big brown eyes.

“There is no ghost, my boy. It’s only a story” He assured him, as he lay down next to him on the hard wooden floor. “But Will said the ghost smashed all the mirrors”

Robin sighed, damn Will, why did he always have to put such ideas into his boy’s head. And right before bedtime. “Someone did, a long time ago, but it was not a ghost.”

“How do you know?” the boy asked, snuggling up to his father as he put his arm around the little boy.

How did he know? If Regina was a ghost, who was to say that she didn’t break those mirrors? Or maybe she just broke the mirrors before she became a ghost. Robin didn’t like that thought, that she had been trapped here for so long that eventually she had died here. Alone. Maybe that was what was in the room, the one she had asked them no to enter. If it was, Robin wasn’t in a hurry to find out. “I don’t know, the same way as Will thinks he knows it’s the ghost, I suppose”

Maybe it was too complex a thing to explain to a four year old, right before he went to sleep. Roland didn’t reply, but just looked up at his father with his big eyes. “I’ll wake you if I hear a ghost, alright?” Roland nodded quiet but firmly, before he snuggled closer and shut his eyes. Within moments he was asleep.

It was another matter for Robin. Ever since he left this place, he had looked forward to coming back and seeing the mysterious Regina again. But at the same time his mind was bugging him with ideas that maybe she was a ghost, or maybe it had been a one time thing, or maybe it had just been a dream, all of it. Maybe he wouldn’t see her again, even if he managed to fall asleep.

Of course all this thinking, meant it took forever for Robin to fall asleep. He lay, staring at the ceiling, in the light of the dying fire, while the sounds of snoring intensified all around him. It had been a long day and Robin could feel it in every muscle, and yet he was suddenly wide awake, now that he finally had the chance to sleep. It was frustrating, to say the least. His mind only seemed to go faster and faster. It took very serious control to try and slow it down. To just close his eyes and think of nothing, in the hopes that it would make him go to sleep.

“I was starting to think you wouldn’t come back” Robin recognized her voice, even before he opened his eyes, to see her sitting on the floor next to him. Sitting up, he looked around the empty hall, well, empty compared to how it had looked as he fell asleep. “I am a man of my word, my lady, but I am sorry for being so late” a smile tugged at the corner of his mouth, as he got comfortable on the floor, sitting next to her. “Where is everyone?”

Regina’s brow furrowed as she looked at him. “Everyone?”

“My group.. my son. They were all sleeping in here, when I fell asleep”

She continued to look more confused “I don’t know… I haven’t seen anyone but you” Robin didn’t look any less confused than her. He had thought that everyone who came to the castle would be transported to this black and while world, when they went to sleep. But that didn’t seem to be the case. “Odd” Robin murmured. “I guess that explains why you haven’t had more visits”

“But it doesn’t explain why you are here” That was true, it didn’t. She had said the only other person to visit her, had been her stepdaughter. Meaning someone who had a connection to her. Then why was he able to see her? As far as he knew, he had no connection to her, not until he met her anyway. “Might just be a random thing”

“Not very likely” She looked skeptical, perhaps it wasn’t how magic worked. Robin didn’t know much about magic, not at all.

“Just luck then?” He met her dark eyes with his own and managed to get a slight smile out of her. “If that’s what you want to call it.”

“That is definitely what I want to call it” Robin assured her, still holding her eyes with his.

When their mutual staring didn’t go anywhere, Robin got to his feet and by habit held out his hand for her to take, so she could get up more easily. It was only when she looked at his hand, that he realized she couldn’t take it. “Apologies.. I forgot where I was for a moment” He let the hand fall down along side him and sighed. It was the simplest of helpful gestures, but he couldn’t even do that.

“Please, Robin it’s fine.” Regina got up off the floor and stood next to him “I could have made the same mistake myself”

“Still.. stupid mistake” Robin made sure to get rid of the apologetic look on his face, before he looked back at her. “You look lovely by the way” She had changed her dress, he noticed that much. It wasn’t the gowns he had imagined for her, when she told him she was a queen. It was a simple cut dress, that looked most of all like an undergarment, or something that someone poor would wear, someone.. well like him. Not like him of course, a woman, but you get the point. The material looked rough, from what he could tell and he would guess either light color of some kind or grey. It looked grey to him, but then again everything looked grey here.

“Pfft, this?” She gestured to herself and her dress. “Don’t you have any women in your group, or are you just that good a liar?”

“Are you totally incapable of taking a compliment?”

“Yes” she answered back promptly, followed by a moment of silence, before she chuckled lightly. He smiled back at her, shaking his head a bit. “Well, we shall have to improve on that”

“I’m sorry to disappoint, but I only have two dresses, you’ve already seen the complete extend of my wardrobe”

“If you think I’d only compliment you on your choice of dresses, you are going to be sorely disappointed” Robin quipped back at her, with another charming smile.

“You’re planning on complimenting my chess skills too?” Regina asked with a crooked grin.

“Among other things” Robin chuckled as he followed her to the library. While he walked behind her, he found it hard not to let his eyes drift to those ‘other things’.

 

~*~*~*~

 

“So how did it go? The move .. You’ve kept me waiting for a week, the least you can do is tell me what you’ve been doing all that time” Robin was pretty sure that she was trying to distract him, since it was his move. Not that she needed to do that, she was still kicking his ass.

Robin Kept his eyes on the chessboard and his fingers stroking his chin, like he was deep in thought, which he wasn’t. He knew perfectly well that she had him cornered, she had just won yet another game. He might not think too logical, but he was used to thinking one or two steps ahead. And no matter how many different moves he considered, they all ended with him losing.

“Well, once I had them convinced to go, it was all smooth sailing.. But it took a while”

Regina leaned in over the table, crossing her arms as they lay across it and watched him as he ‘considered his next move’. “How come?”

Robin shrugged, glancing up at her shortly, “let’s just say calling this place a haunted castle, wasn’t my best idea”

“Not if you were trying to sell the place to them” Regina smiled, with a shake of her dark locks. “But who says it’s haunted?” Her smile wavered a bit around the edges, which of course he did notice, despite his pretence to be busy ‘figuring out’ his next move.

“Just the locals” Robin replied, brushing it off like it meant nothing. “Something about an evil witch and crushing hearts with her bare hands .. But clearly that is not the case” Maybe she was a ghost and maybe she wasn’t, but an evil witch she was not, Robin was willing to bet on that. Sure he didn’t know about her past, or what had made her end up here. But he usually had a way with people, he could tell if they were worth trusting or not, from not much more than a look. And for some reason he trusted her, she was no evil witch. 

When he looked up at her again, her smile was weak but her eyes were looking straight at him. Robin couldn’t tell what she was thinking, but if his compliment wasn’t enough to make her smile more than that, she had to be thinking something. Facing his defeat, Robin moved a chess piece, as she sat silently, looking at him. “How can you think you know me so well” She made her own move, seemingly without thinking about it, before she looked up at him again. “You don’t know me at all.”

Robin shrugged, looking at his sorry attempt to beat her at chess. “I like to think I’m a good judge of character” he made another move and looked up at her again. “You can always tell me about yourself, if you want me to make an informed decision”

“It’s a very long story” She tried, like that would make him less interested.

“Well, we do have plenty of time” Robin smiled, leaning back in his chair.

“Not now, Robin” She might have meant to snap at him, but it came out more like a moody murmur. His smile vanished at her complete lack of one. She wasn’t looking at him now, instead she was looking down at the table, with pain in her eyes. Great, good job Robin. He was supposed to make her smile, not frown, he was supposed to be good company, unlike her stepdaughter.

No matter how long she had been trapped in here, her past seemed to still bother her. He supposed that since she hadn’t had anyone to talk to, she couldn’t really have moved past it. Plus without any sense of time passing, how could she move on? Nothing new happened here, nothing that could take her mind off of the past. Except for him.

Better not start poking around in her past, if he was going to take her mind off it and let her move on. “I .. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. You don’t have to tell me anything, you don’t want to”

“Thank you” she said quietly, looking back at the chessboard. “I will tell you one thing though”

“Yeah?” Robin looked at her, with a slight smile on his face, hoping that she would indulge him, in his want to know more about her.

Regina smiled up at him, before she moved her chess piece, “Checkmate”

Groaning, Robin planted his face on the table. “That’s it, I give up. Can we please do something else?”

 

~*~*~*~

 

They settled for taking another stroll around the castle, talking casually as they went. Mostly about him, Robin wasn’t the kind of person who liked to talk about himself, but he didn’t mind. He could understand if she didn’t want to share her past just yet. So they talked about him instead, not so much the past, more the present.

They walked into the kitchen, where there was yet another fire burning. Robin couldn’t quite settle on whether it was nice or unnerving that the fires were always burning. It was just another thing that hinted at time standing still here. Regina leaned against the table in the middle of the room, while Robin looked around. He opened up cupboards, looked into jars and drawers. He had been doing that on their walk around the castle too, ever since she beat him at chess once again. He’d traced the walls with his hands, the edge of tables with his fingers, and pick up almost every object so he could inspect it. It all felt so real, there were no flaws in the details. It didn’t feel at all like a dream and Robin had to believe that this was more than just that. There was something more to this, there had to be.

He was talking about their plans for the castle. Of course they had just been there for a day, so the group as a whole, didn’t have that much planned yet. But Robin had been there longer, plus he had had a whole week to think about it, so he had a lot of ideas.

“I think we will turn the big hall into the mess hall, we wouldn’t all be able to fit in here.. We just have to craft some tables and benches. But that will have to wait, keeping warm is a bit higher on the list of priorities” He lifted up a bowl and weighed it in his hands, before putting it down again.

“Couldn’t you just use the tables and chairs from around the castle?” Regina asked, lifting herself up to sit on the table.

“They’re .. eh” He glanced back at her. “They’re not exactly .. sturdy anymore” Robin found a book of recipes and started flipping through it.

“Define ‘not sturdy’ ” She sounded like she had a frown on her face (how did he even know how that sounded?), but he didn’t look up to check.

“Well..” Robin flipped through another couple of pages, not seeing how she got off the table and came over to him. It wasn’t until she beat the book out of his hand, making it fall to the floor with a loud clatter, that he realized she was standing right in front of him, with a rather stern look on her face.

“Would you stop touching everything for one moment and tell me – Tell me how run down the castle is – Tell me how long I’ve been stuck here” Her voice was sharp and had quite the bite to it, as she stood so close to him, he could easily have reached out and touched her, if it wasn’t for the fact that he couldn’t. Had he been able to touch her, he would also have been able to feel her breath on his face. But as it were, he felt nothing, but the twinge of pain, by the thought of what he had to tell her now.

Looking into her eyes he could see the desperation, the anger and everything else that had to be going through her mind.

“It’s not that easy to tell ..”

“Robin” She warned, not backing down one inch. Robin was backed up against the kitchen counter, not that he had to be, but he supposed that that was just a natural reaction. He didn’t want to see her go right through him, so he backed up as far as he could, that way he could at least pretend that they could touch. This was all too confusing, for him to justify reacting as he did.

Sighing, he gave in “it’s been.. a lifetime .. At least”

Regina backed off a few steps as the spark in her eyes died. “A lifetime..” She repeated quietly.

“At least. Probably more like two or three.. I’m sorry”

“That long?” Robin nodded solemnly. “If the state of the houses and the furniture are anything to go by” She didn’t look like she was listening, instead she was walking back to the table, leaning against it, looking at the ground. He followed her and leaned against the table right beside where she was, but stayed quiet.

When she didn’t say anything for a long time and Robin was pretty sure that she was crying, he figured that he should probably say something. “I’m sorry” Regina shook her head, her hair was conveniently hanging down in front of her face, so that he couldn’t see her. What he wouldn’t have given to be able to put a hand on her back, or to actually be able to be a shoulder for her to cry on.

“It’s not your fault” Regina murmured, whipping at her cheeks. “It’s just .. I know it has been a long time. I just didn’t realize it had been. .. that long”

Robin just nodded quietly. There was nothing he could say to make it better and nothing he could do either. Had he been able to, he would have put her arm around her and held her until she felt better, or just stopped crying. But he couldn’t, there wasn’t a damn thing he could do about all of this.

“Doesn’t matter anyway” She continued, removing the pressure of having to say something, from Robin. “Might as well get used to it, it seems I’m going to be stuck here forever”

He frowned as he looked at her. “How do you know that?”

“Because there was one person, who could get me out of here.. But since it’s been this long..” she trailed off, closing her eyes as she shook her head.

Dead – he imagined. “There might be someone else now, with the same .. abilities?” Of course Robin had no idea what those abilities would be, but there had to be, right? If it had something to do with magic, he was sure that someone would have to have the same magic talents now.

But Regina just shook her head, “No .. there’s no one” She was trying to be brave, that much was obvious, from how she had stopped herself from crying and was forcing a slight smile to stay on her lips. It only made it worse.

His frown deepened for a second “Not even me?” She looked at him, wiping her cheek again. “It’s sweet of you to offer. But no, not even you.. there’s nothing you can do” Her eyes fell on the floor again.

Robin sighed, unable not to be frustrated by her words. He was apparently the only one who even knew that she was there and yet he couldn’t help her. The more time he spent with her, the more he wanted to help her, so to know that he couldn’t, wasn’t easy. Of course it was nothing compared to how hard this had to be on her, especially now. Knowing a bit more about how much time had passed. Robin knew next to nothing about her life before all this, but if he tried to put himself in her shoes, it wasn’t hard to imagine why she was upset. If he was trapped somewhere and so much time went by, without him aging. Well, everyone he knew would be dead and gone, even Roland. That would be awful, just awful, to miss his son’s entire life like that. The only thing worse than that, would be knowing that all your loved ones were dead and be stuck in a place like this.

“I think I want to be alone for a while.. “ She said quietly, before she pushed away from the table and walked towards the door. Regina turned as she reached the door and looked back at him. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll be here” He assured her and tried to smile, but he wasn’t sure it came off as sincere.

Her own was weak and brief, but it was still a smile, even if it was forced, before she turned and walked away.

Robin spent the rest of his night, in the kitchen, doing nothing. Time passed so much slower, without having Regina to talk to. And with every torturously slow-passing minute he understood and sympathized with Regina more and more. He got to leave this god-awful place, but she had to stay. It was a living hell. 

 

~*~*~*~

 

The next couple of nights, Regina was more quiet than usual and smiled far less than she had before, even when he really did his best to flirt with her. They talked about his day and how things were coming along with the castle, but she didn’t seem as interested as she had before. It seemed to be up to Robin to keep the conversation going and it wasn’t always easy. So they had long and awkward silences, where he just wished he could make it better somehow. But he couldn’t and he felt horrible for it and so utterly useless. 

He woke up in the morning, feeling exhausted and guilty for leaving Regina behind in that place and for not being able to cheer her up, while he was there. Robin worked himself to exhaustion during the day, so that he could fall asleep at night. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to be with her, but seeing her so sad, made it hard to enjoy her company, because he couldn’t change it. And he really couldn’t blame her, he would be depressed too, if he was the one who was trapped there, with no possible way of getting out. Hell, he was depressed, on her behalf. Which didn’t help her at all, but he couldn’t help it. The whole situation was depressing.

Poking his porridge absentmindedly, Robin almost missed Roland running towards him. In fact he would have, if the boy hadn’t been yelling “Daddy, daddy!!”

“What what?” Robin said, noticing just how exhausted he sounded. But luckily Roland didn’t seem to take note.

The boy pulled at Robin’s sleeve until he squatted down, so he could whisper in his ear. “I found a dead woman” Robin felt the blood rush away from his face, his thoughts immediately went to Regina. He couldn’t think of anyone else it could be, but that didn’t mean that he liked the thought. So she really was a ghost? He had really hoped to be proven wrong, when it came to that theory. But now he was definitely paying attention.

“You .. what?” Roland just nodded. “Show me where”

It didn’t take long for Roland to find the place again, apparently he had inherited Robin’s sense of direction. But as soon as Robin noticed where he was going, he stopped walking “Roland no, you’re not supposed to go in there”

“But daddy, someone’s dead” Roland kept walking towards the door and right through it.

That was her room, Regina’s room. He had promised her not to go in there. She had told him, there was no way that he could help her. But maybe .. Maybe if he went in there, he could find a clue to how she had come to be in that place. Hell, maybe there would even be a clue as to how to get her out. It wouldn’t be much, but it was certainly better than nothing.  And he needed to do something, anything, to help her. But if she was in there, dead, then what? Robin couldn’t help but fear for what he would see, when he stepped through the door. The only thing that could make all of this worse, was if she was dead, and he had been flirting with a ghost all this time.

If she ever found out, she would kill him .. well, if she could. Robin shook his head and took a deep breath, before he went after Roland. He took all of one step inside the room, before he came to a sudden stop. That was definitely her, no question about it.

The room was in the same state as the rest of the castle, broken down and covered in dust. But where she lay, in her bed, and in the perfect circle around her, there wasn’t a speck of dust. Like some sort of spell was put over her. She looked beautiful in color, not that he had had any doubt that she would.

When Robin finally snapped out of his own head, he rushed to her side and without thinking about it, he pressed two fingers against her neck, feeling for a pulse and breathing a sigh of relief, when he found one. She was cold and pale, but definitely alive. He would have been more excited about finally touching her, if she had been awake to feel it. But for now he was happy just to find out that she was still breathing.

“Is she dead daddy?” Robin looked over to Roland, waving him closer. “No, son .. she’s asleep”

“Can we wake her up?” He asked, staring at Regina with his big brown eyes. “She’s in a very deep sleep, it is going to take something special to wake her up”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know – but I’m going to find out”

Regina wasn’t a ghost, she was perfect and real and right there. Robin didn’t care what it would take, he was going to get her out of that hellish place.


	3. Chapter 3

Whatever dust had stirred up, upon Robin and Roland’s arrival to the room, seemed to have settled now, as several people had had a look into the room, but had quietly left again, once they caught a glimpse of the brooding Robin. 

“Did you know she was here?” Will asked, as he and Robin stood at the foot of her bed. The news of the discovery had run through the castle faster than Robin had thought it would. Maybe he should have stopped it, but that was too late now. At least it meant that a fire had been started, in the hope that it would warm her up, so her skin wasn’t so cold.

“No .. She told me not to go in here” Had he followed her demand, he would never have found her and Robin was quite sure that he would never have been able to wake her. Of course he didn’t know if he would be able to now. But the chances were certainly bigger now.

“She .. what? – you’re gonna have to explain that, mate”

Robin realized that he hadn’t exactly told anyone about her, or that he had been seeing her in his dreams, every night since they came here. “I’ve been .. dreaming about her, ever since we came here.” It was a bit more complicated than that, but that was the gist of it. “I thought we all would see her.. but apparently it’s just me” Robin said, his eyes still glued to her. He hadn’t looked much at other things since he found her. Like staring at her, would give him a clue as to how he could wake her up. She looked peaceful here, but Robin knew that she wasn’t, not really. She was trapped and it was hell for her.

“Lucky sod” Will just said, nudging Robin with his elbow.

“If I can wake her up, yes.. if not. Then I’ll be the person who has to tell her, that she really will be stuck in there forever. “ Robin sighed and glanced at Will. Not to mention that he would spend every night with her, both knowing that they were stuck that way. At least until his group moved out and then .. she would be alone again. Which wasn’t better at all. Being as sad as she was at the moment, was one thing, but being sad all alone, was another thing entirely. Robin sighed and tore his eyes away from Regina’s sleeping body, to look around the room. There wasn’t much décor in the room, except for a painting above the fireplace. It was dusty and faded like the one in the library, but this one looked like it was depicting a small boy, maybe 6 or 7 years old. Robin couldn’t help but wish that it wasn’t her boy. Maybe it was her brother, please god let it be her brother.

There wasn’t much in the room, besides the bed, the fireplace, and a small desk, which looked like it was about to fall in on itself. But on top of it, was an envelope, covered in dust. As he moved to pick it up, the paper tore in several places, meaning he didn’t have to break the seal to get the letter out. Robin glanced at Will, before he turned his back to him and carefully unfolded the letter.

 

_My dearest Henry_

_Please forgive me, I should have tried harder._

_All my love,_

_Your mother_

It was short and slightly cryptic, _I should have tried harder_? What did that mean? Harder how? And what did she need forgiveness for? All those things were buzzing around Robin’s mind, but the one thing that stood out, was the one that was underlined with the word _Mother_ , in the letter. So the boy in the picture, might very well be this ‘Henry’. He felt his heart sink, when he suddenly understood why she had been so sad in the past few nights. When Robin had told her, that she had been in that black and white dream world, for 2 or 3 lifetimes, she must have realized that she missed his entire life. As if things couldn’t get any worse.

“She has a son – _Had_ a son” he said quietly, looking back at Will. He didn’t reply, just looked from her, back to him, meeting Robin’s eyes and clearly seeing that he was upset.

“But she’s been here for so long, that she missed the whole of his life. He couldn’t possibly be alive now” Robin shook his head, just imagining what that would be like, was painful. Having to live through it, couldn’t possibly be any easier.

“How long exactly has she been like this?”

Robin shrugged lightly “Hard to say how long. But in her world, where she is now, this place looks almost new. All of this” He gestured to the room around them. “All this decay, happened while she was like this” Will was silent, which was odd for him, the man usually never shut up.

That was it, Robin took a deep breath, he had to do something, anything. “I have to help her” He said, determination growing as he looked to Will. When he just looked back at him, with a big question mark on his face, Robin continued.

“You might well ask how – I have no idea. But I know her name and I know her son’s name. And I know that she is, or was, a queen. She might not want to tell me about who she is. But someone has to know. Someone must have written down something – anything.” Robin stepped over to Regina’s bedside and carefully folded up the letter, before he put it on her torso and took her hand, to place on top of it. Before he put it down, he held onto it for a moment, thumb softly caressing the back of her hand. It only hit him now, that this was the first time that he had touched her. But it didn’t feel as such, because she wasn’t there, not really. She was still trapped in that dream-hell of hers. As he memorized the feeling of her skin, Robin made a silent vow to save her. Whatever it took, he would get her out of there, if he could. He would make that promise to her too, as soon as he saw her again. But even if things went well, he predicted that that might be a while. Giving her hand a last squeeze, he put it down on top of the letter.

“You remember that monastery we hid at a few years ago?” Robin asked, as soon as he was standing upright again. Will nodded, crossing his arms and stepping closer. “One of the monks kept boasting about their library.. they have to have some history books among all that – It’s worth a try” Will nodded again,

“But Robin, we need you here. We’re not nearly ready for winter and it’ll be here before you know it. You could get stuck out there, or worse yet, you could get caught.”

“You can handle things here, you know what we need. And I’ve never been in a pinch I couldn’t get out of. No need to worry, I’ll be back before you know it” Robin could hear how he was trying to pitch the idea, maybe even to himself. He did see Will’s point, he was needed here, he was the leader, he was supposed to be here to protect them and take care of them. But he also needed to do this, for her. He was the only one who could see her, if he didn’t try to help her, then who would? Perhaps she really would be stuck in there forever. And she had already suffered more than enough. “I am the only one who might be able to help her.. She needs me to do this” The more he looked at Regina, the more confident he got in his decision. He couldn’t just leave her there to suffer, no more than he would have been able to, if he had found her with a broken leg. Robin might not call himself a hero, but he had a conscience and if he didn’t at least try to help her, the memory of her sad eyes would haunt him forever.

“I am doing this Will, the only question is if you are going to help me or not”

~*~*~*~

Robin rode hard for 4 days. It took longer to find the monastery than he thought it would, because he had slightly misplaced it, in his mind.

Maybe it was his bad luck, or maybe it was just the time of the year. But Robin somehow managed to get caught in the rain once again. It got dark about an hour ago, but he knew, if he just followed the road, he should get to the monastery. It was remote, surrounded by nature, like the brothers liked it. But honestly, it made it bloody hard to locate. Which, of course, had been why his group had been able to hide there for a good long while. The brothers were supportive of their cause and were happy to help. Even more so, because Robin had had a wailing baby with him, it wasn’t exactly the best circumstances to be on the run in. They had helped the brothers out with a few repairs around the monastery and in turn, they had gotten to stay safe, warm, and fed through the winter. Robin would be forever in their debt, but for now he needed their help once again.

If you didn’t know any better, this place looked like big scary place, in the rain and the dark. It looked like the kind of place that would be haunted. Not at all like the safe heaven it actually was. Robin supposed that in that way, it was like Regina’s castle. That place had turned out to be quite a safe heaven too. Even with all the work that needed to be done, it was hidden and it was warm. Which was more than Robin had dared to hope for, when he went looking for the place. He owed the safety of his group – of his son, to Regina. Will could complain all he liked (which Robin assumed was only for the extra responsibilities, than for actual worry for him), but he owed Regina this, he owed her to at least try.

That was what was on his mind, as he got off the horse, and dragged it with him, to the big wooden door. There was a rope at the door, connected to a bell somewhere, but Robin could barely hear it, as he pulled the rope. As someone opened the small hatch in the gate, he pulled back his hood, so he could face the man at the door.

“Robin?” The man asked on the other side of the door, his face was in the dark, so Robin wasn’t sure who of the monks it was. It had been years since he stayed there last, so he wasn’t sure that it was all the same people who lived there.

“Hello” He greeted with an easy smile, although his body was screaming for rest. “You wouldn’t happen to have a spare bed, for a weary traveler, would you?” There was a moment of silence, before the hatch closed and the door opened instead. When it did, he saw a familiar face, holding a torch.

“Tuck!” Robin smiled, making the other man chuckle, as they met half way for a brief hug. He was glad to see a friendly face, one who hopefully wouldn’t need much persuasion to help him.

They exchanged pleasantries as Tuck led the way to the stables, where Robin could strip, rub down, and feed his horse, before they went inside. They caught up on how they both were and how they had been in the time they hadn’t been in touch. Tuck was one of the brothers he had spoken the most to, in the winter they had been at the monastery. In fact, if he hadn’t been so much against sleeping under the stars, he might have joined Robin’s group. But Tuck kept saying that he needed his bed and three meals a day. It was all kept in a light tone, it wasn’t as if Robin needed more men, and Tuck wasn’t looking for a way to get out of his own brotherhood. They were just good friends, who didn’t like that so much time passed between visits. And maybe Robin ought to go and see him more, but he didn’t want to get him into trouble, because of him. Which was also why they had looked in other places for shelter in the winter, for this year.

Soon after, Robin was placed in front of the fire, stripped of every piece of clothing he didn’t need, left in only his trousers and a cotton shirt. Everything else was hung to dry, but Robin was sitting so close to the fire, that he didn’t need any more clothes than that and the bowl of soup in his hands, warming him pleasantly from the inside.

“So what brings you here, Robin? I assume it’s not just my pleasant company” Tuck said, sitting opposite of Robin, watching him eat.

Robin smiled around a mouthful of soup, taking his time to swallow it, before he replied. “Believe me, your company is a big plus, but no, it’s not the only reason I’m here.” He looked at the fire for a moment, then back to his friend, who was patiently waiting for him to continue. “I need your help. But not like last time. I found this .. person, and I need to know their past, to be able to help them.”

“This person .. wouldn’t happen to be a woman, would it?”

Robin fought a smitten smirk as he shucked down a couple more spoonfuls of soup. Was he really that transparent? “It is.. but it’s not what you think”

“Ah” Tuck grinned, pretending to believe him “So she isn’t pretty?”

With how Tuck spoke, sometimes Robin wondered how he ever got to be a monk. “No no, she’s .. She’s beautiful” He couldn’t help the soft tone in his voice and the slightly dreamy look in his eyes, as he thought about her.

Tuck smiled, looking damn pleased with himself.

“But that’s not the point.” Robin pointed out as he sobered and looked more serious “She’s under some kind of curse and I think the key to breaking it, is figuring out her past” Tuck seemed to sober a bit at the serious tone too, and nodded for him to continue.

“I know her name, her son’s name and that she was a queen. So I was hoping that I might be able to find something in that library you keep bragging about”

Tuck nodded again “It’s a good place to start – but maybe once you’ve dried off and gotten some sleep”

Robin nodded a bit, as much as he wanted to get back as soon as he could, he knew that he wouldn’t be able to read, let alone understand much tonight. He was exhausted and he needed to sleep, that way he’d probably be able to find, whatever it was he needed to find, faster.

“Eat up and I’ll show you to your room” Robin nodded again and ate some more soup. The promise of a warm bed, sounded very good to him.

~*~*~*~

The next morning it was still raining and Robin did not feel rested. Yet another night had gone by without him seeing Regina, while knowing that she was alone and probably wondering where he was (he hoped, but also feared). He had gone against her wishes, in more than one way. He’d entered the one room she’d told him not to, he’d left the castle to look into her past, which she hadn’t want to share with him, and he had left her alone, which he hoped she wouldn’t like, or he had done a poor job of entertaining her. So as much as he hated being away, he also feared going back and telling her just what he had found out. And that he entered her room. Either she would understand, or she’d rip his head off.. well, if she could. Maybe he should be thankful that she wouldn’t actually be able to kill him. It was a bit like a blessing in disguise, however much Robin might hate said blessing. Not having been able to comfort her, when she learned about her son, hadn’t been easy. Something simple as a hand to hold or a hug, might help her, but he couldn’t even do that.  

Maybe this was a bad idea, but he’d come this far and it was too late to turn back now.

~*~*~*~

Robin spent a couple of days, digging through books, alongside , Thomas, a dusty old monk, who claimed to know the library better than the back of his own hand. With the speed that he found what Robin was looking for, that had to be true. There were just so many books to look through, that it took a couple of days to get through it all. But by the end of the second day, Robin was left dumbstruck, shoulders slumped, as he sat staring at the stacks of books in front of him.

This was not how he thought his search would go. Not at all. Now he could see why she didn’t want to share her past with him. He just couldn’t believe it, could not wrap his mind around it. It just went against all assumptions he had made about her. Maybe he just wasn’t a good judge of character after all.

At a light cough behind him, Robin was shook out of his own head, and turned around to find Tuck standing behind him. But Robin just glared at him, still frowning, before he turned back around.

“You scared off our librarian”

“Heard that did you?” Robin growled, not in the mood to even try and be civil.

“Apparently you told him to ‘get the hell out’” Tuck said, patiently as ever, as he sat down on the chair next to Robin. “Not that I mind you getting angry, but this is a house of god, Robin, and Thomas took it very personally”

Sighing, Robin ran a hand through his hair. He had to admit that he had forgotten where he was and that these people were helping him out of the good of their hearts. “I’m sorry.. “ He got up from the chair and paced the floor for a while. “I just can’t believe it – how could I be _this_ wrong? I’m never _this_ wrong!” He couldn’t help the temper that flared up in him. If he had to be wrong about something, Robin would want it to be anything but this. He didn’t want to be wrong about her. Because now he wasn’t sure if he wanted to free her from her prison anymore.

“Wrong about what? About _her_?” Tuck asked, Robin just nodded, teeth clenched, as he kept pacing, just so he wouldn’t end up hitting somebody or flipping the table.

“She’s a witch, just like the tale said. A bad, evil, witch who kills to get what she wants. She killed her own son” - _I should have tried harder.-_ Suddenly that made much more sense. She killed him and she wanted his forgiveness. Well, it was a little late for that, wasn’t it? “I was wrong about her – everything I thought she was, turned out to be a lie. She’s not a victim, she’s not innocent. She’s dangerous and she deserves what she got” Robin felt sick to his stomach just saying the words. He had the facts now, he knew the truth. But in his mind it just didn’t fit. Everything he had thought about her, everything he thought he had seen in her.. Was she just that good a liar?

In the books she was written as a cold hearted villain, who only wanted power and would do whatever it took, to get it. Which was the furthest thing from what he had thought of her.

“It’s clearly not what you hoped to find.. But aren’t you glad you know, instead of breaking the curse and be under her evil reign?”

Robin glared at him, but the heat in it died quickly, leaving his eyes looking sad and tired more than anything. “I guess.. “ His shoulders slumped once more. “I should get home” He added quietly and turned towards the door.

“It’s already dark Robin”

“Right” He stopped. “I’ll just go to bed then” He hadn’t actually had anything to eat since breakfast. But right now, he didn’t think that he would be able to hold down anything.

~*~*~*~

Robin didn’t sleep though. Instead he lay awake, going over every word he had ever exchanged with her, wondering how he did not see through her act. If there was anything Robin didn’t like, it was being lied to. And discovering that Regina had done nothing but lie, just angered him beyond belief. The main reason he got so angry, was probably because he was hurt, that she’d lie to him like that. He just hadn’t thought that he was such a softy, that he could fall for someone he hardly knew and let them hurt him like that. Quite embarrassing actually, to have gotten so fond of someone and then found out that she had done nothing but lie to him. It seemed more reasonable to be angry and he was that too, definitely.

The ride home seemed short. Both because he didn’t get lost and because part of him feared what was waiting him, as soon as he fell asleep. As he neared the castle, he went over all that he had learned of her past, once again, which was quite a bit.

Regina was born into a wealthy family, with a mother who was quite set on Regina becoming a queen. So when the king, whose wife had passed away, was traveling through the area where they lived: Regina and her mother put a curse on the horse, his daughter Snow was riding. Making it run off with the young girl. That way it looked like, Regina was quite the hero when she swooped in and saved her. They ensnared him further with their magic and soon after the king proposed to Regina, which she of course accepted.

For four years, Regina kept spinning her web around everyone that surrounded the king, making them teach her how to rule and making them think she was a wonderful person, before she killed off the king. Nobody knew of course, she made it look like an accident, so that she could rule. Snow was too young to rule at the time, so Regina did. She didn’t wait long though, before she took a lover and got pregnant. Then she convinced the people at court, that she was the rightful ruler and her child would be so too, bastard or not. But, before she gave birth, Snow had gathered enough of a following to push her out and claim the throne and the title as queen.

When she had become the queen, she could go after Regina and punish her for killing the king. She was a traitor to the crown. When they finally caught up to her, she had a young son. Snow could not stand the idea of a child having to live with her and be brought up by someone so cold and heartless. So she rescued him. But Regina was stubborn and managed to get him back. This happened twice. The third time they caught up with him, Regina lashed out in a fit of anger and killed her son, crushing his heart in her own hand. She claimed that she would rather see him die, than have his mind tainted by Snow’s kindness. But while she was distracted, Snow and her husband managed to put some kind of cuff on her, that rendered her magic useless. This made them able to imprison her, so she could finally be punished for all her crimes.

That was all there was about Regina, the rest was about how Snow and her husband had ruled the kingdom for years and years and had their own children and so on.

As most history books, the story didn’t have that many details and it was very black and white, which of course made Regina look very bad. But with the facts that were there, Robin couldn’t see how he could ever pity her again. She had killed her own son, how could he ever pity someone who did that?    

~*~*~*~

It was quite the welcome he had gotten, when he returned. Especially Will had been excited to see him return. Probably just so he could go back to not being the one in charge. Time would tell if he had messed up anything of not. Robin had a chat with him, about what he had learned on his trip. It didn’t make Robin feel any better about it.

By now they had all gotten their own rooms, not all had beds, but it was a bit more privacy, which was a rare thing for their group. Come spring they would probably start making furniture, such as beds and then they would all be living like kings. If they would still be here at that time. For now everything seemed to be up in the air.

Even though he was exhausted, Robin found it very hard to fall asleep that night. He wasn’t looking forward to seeing her, which was a first. It was very late, before he finally drifted off, but when he did, he found himself right where he thought he’d be. In the black and white world, right where he had fallen asleep. He got up and went to look for her – better to get this over with.

He found her in the hallway, staring out the window. She was still in that grey, simple, dress, and her black hair was loosely tumbling down her back, just an inch short of reaching her waist.

“Regina” She turned to face him, normally he would have smiled at her, but he couldn’t make himself do it, no matter how beautiful she looked.

“Where have you been?” She asked as she stepped towards him. Regina wasn’t smiling, but she wasn’t frowning either. Robin couldn’t tell if she was at all affected by the fact that he had been gone for so long. But after taking a few steps, she must have seen that he wasn’t smiling. “What’s wrong?”

Robin didn’t look her in the eye, he just couldn’t. She would try and lie to him, he was sure of it. But maybe if he didn’t look her in the eye, he’d be able to tell when she lied.

He took a moment to figure out where to start. He had been thinking about how this would go, ever since he left Tuck, but he hadn’t thought about how to start.

“Roland went into your room and I followed him” He started. Glancing to her face, he was waiting for a reaction. She had told him, not to go in there, wouldn’t she be angry when she found out that he had? – well, apparently not.

“I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later” Regina commented quietly. Which only confused him. But he wouldn’t let that stop him.  

“I found your letter and I went away to find out more about you. Thinking that if I knew your past I could save you from this curse. But now I know” His frown seemed to deepen, turning into an expression of anger, one that Regina seemed to notice. Well, at least he had her attention now.

“I know Regina – I know everything” He added, teeth clenching.

Frown deepening, Regina took a step back. “Everything – just like that. And now you think you know me, based on what? Something you read in a book” Her voice was tense, finally her true self was bleeding through.

“I know what you’ve done. I don’t know you, but I’m not so sure I want to anymore” He finally moved his eyes and met hers. The darkness he saw there, was enough to make him thankful that she couldn’t actually hurt him.  

“And what exactly is it I’m supposed to have done? – Just so we’re on the same page” She bit back at him. She might not be able to hurt him, but Robin had a feeling that this would not end quietly. The fact that she was acting like she had no idea what he was talking about, didn’t help. She was clearly still trying to lie her way out of this.  

So Robin took a deep breath, before he started listing all the things, she had done. “First you risked the life of a young girl, to get the attention of the king. Then you used your magic to get him to marry you, and to get the people at court to like you” Robin didn’t sound as if his anger was getting any lesser and Regina couldn’t do much but stand and listen as he made a long list of her sins, although she looked anything but happy. “And then you killed the king, so you could be queen. You attempted to cut Snow off from being queen, by taking a lover and falling pregnant. I know Snow took your son from you, but that was no reason to kill him!”

Robin was almost yelling at the end, he was just so frustrated, that she had deceived him in the way she had.

“I killed my son?” The frown on her own face, looked as if it had been chiseled into her skin, only matched by the anger in her voice. “I _killed_   - _my son_ ” She looked at him in disbelief.

“I know you don’t know me at all and maybe that’s my fault. But if you can believe that I could ever – “ She couldn’t even finish the sentence, her eyes big and wide as she looked at him. Pretending to be shocked that he could even think she could do such a thing. Robin watched her as her hands curled into fists at her sides.

“Stop lying Regina. It’s over. Whatever it is you wanted from me, you can forget it”

“Robin, I –“

“Don’t” He pointed a finger at her and made a point out of not yelling at her. “I can be civil, even to you. But don’t think we’re friends or anything like that – you deserve this – all of this” He growled, before he turned and left her standing alone, looking after him, absolutely speechless.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll just include a small warning, for violence, mentions of violence and mentions of abuse. Just so you're warned, if you don't like reading that kind of thing. It's not very graphic, but now you're warned.

Robin’s steps rung out in her ears, as he walked away, leaving Regina feeling like she had just been kicked in the gut.

So that was how Snow had written it, that was how she had twisted what happened, into a way that would benefit her. By saying she killed her own son. With all that Snow had done, that was a low point, even for her. Regina had no idea what happened to Henry, but she knew that she did not kill him, she could never. She had spent his whole life protecting him, why would she suddenly kill him? It made no sense. But that didn’t matter, she had been painted as the villain, why would Robin believe anything she said now?

Then again, what did she have to lose? He couldn’t run away, if she wanted she could corner him and make him listen to her side of the story. But forcing him to do anything didn’t seem like a good strategy. She had all of winter; sooner or later he had to listen to her. The real question was how long she could wait. She had already had to go without talking to him for – she hated not knowing how long it had been – but did she really want to wait any longer? Would it hurt trying to talk to him now? Probably not. She had nothing to lose, except for him and her sanity. And if companions came along as rarely as they had so far, she might just lose it, if he chose not to speak to her.

Sometimes she wondered if she had been sane all the time she had been in here. So many years without company, how did she still have her mind? Maybe she had lost it and Robin was a figment of her imagination, she had made up in some weak attempt to give herself hope. If she did, she had a better imagination than she thought. But Regina was sure, that she would never have been able to come up with the accusation, that she killed her own son.

She waited an hour, or what she thought was an hour, before she set out to find him. After a while of searching, she found him outside, looking up at the ever-blooming apple tree.

“Don’t I get a chance to defend myself?” She started softly, so she wouldn’t startle him.

His shoulder fell visibly, but he kept his back to her as he said “Why, so you can lie to me, some more?”

“I never lied Robin. Please just give me a chance to explain”

Now he turned and sent a pointed look her way “No” So he clearly hadn’t cooled down enough, but it might take a long time for him to do that.

“Robin .. please” Regina wasn’t one to beg, but what choice did she have? She had to get him to listen and forcing him, wasn’t the way to go.

He stepped towards her and stopped right in front of her “I said no” He locked eyes with here for a moment, before he turned to walk away. The coldness in his eyes was new and it definitely weren’t an improvement. It didn’t suit him. Regina knew that she could either back down or keep fighting him. Thankfully, she had never been one to give up at the first sign of trouble.

“Who do you think write the history books? Who do you think wrote all those things you think are true? Nothing is ever black and white, Robin.” He just kept walking. “Wars are complicated, people are complicated, history is complicated.. I’m not asking you to forget what you read, I’m just asking you to hear my side of it” He made it through the door, but Regina wasn’t going to give up that easily, so she followed him. “If your king was to write something about you, when he decides to write about his reign. Don’t you think he will paint you as a villain, a thief, despite all the good you’re doing – just to make him look good?”

He stopped at that, but didn’t turn to look at her. “History is written by the rich, Robin, the winners.. And I lost” If this was winning, it wasn’t worth it. Regina sighed, but she had stopped when he did, with a couple of meters between them. He had stopped, that was progress, now she just had to get him to face her, without looking like he wanted to kill her. “I’ll tell you everything, right from the beginning. You can ask me anything you want. But it’s worth nothing if you won’t give me the benefit of the doubt”

“Just listen to me, please.. if you still hate me, when I’m done, I’ll leave you alone” He turned, slowly, glancing at her over his shoulder. Regina found herself holding her breath as she met his eyes, with a look that could only be a pleading one. “Alright” he sighed, looking conflicted.

Robin made it quite clear, that she had to convince him of the fact that she wasn’t lying. But all she could do, was tell the truth and hope he believed her. “Thank you” It was a start, it was the chance she wanted to defend herself. Now she just had to hope, that she was more convincing than Snow.

He nodded quietly, to her thanks, as he turned to face her fully. “It’s a long story .. maybe we should sit?” Regina gestured lightly towards the seats at the fire, where they had been sitting the first night he came here. It felt odd, suddenly being so stiff and awkward around him. Feeling like he was judging her. Judging her for things she didn’t do.

When Regina walked over to take one seat, Robin followed and took the other. “Right .. where to start” she glanced at him, he didn’t look as if he wanted to kill her, but he didn’t look happy either. Neutral, maybe, that was probably the best starting point she could ask for. If he was really willing to give her the benefit of the doubt, then she might just be able to convince him, that her story was the true one.

“This isn’t all about me .. it goes back much further than that. I’m not exactly sure how far, but at least back to my great grandfather, probably much longer. There has always been bad blood between the Dragonstone family and the Lionheart family. At least that was how my father told the story. My great grandfather was king of this land and as far as I know, all of his family before him was. We are the Lionheart family.. Or we were, I suppose. But the Dragonstones always wanted the throne and there have been many wars because of that. The Lionhearts had the love of the people, but the Dragonstones had gold and lots of it.” So far so good, at least he was still listening. But this was only the beginning and there was so much left to tell.

“But my great grandfather lost his war and the throne to the Dragonstones. And that was the last war for the throne, at least until my time.” Of course Regina didn’t know what might have happened, after she got inhere. For all she knew, there could have been another war.

“My father never wanted to go into battle to get the throne back, not even if it was the best for the kingdom. But my mother, was determined to get another Lionheart on the throne. From the day I was born, I was raised to be the next queen.”

“That’s why you were named Regina?” Robin guessed

Regina looked up as he spoke, smiling lightly at him. “Yes. Subtlety was not something my mother was very good at” There was a small curl in the corner of Robin’s mouth, which in turn made Regina feel a bit more confident in her story.

“I was raised to be a queen, to walk tall, talk properly, I studied foreign countries and my mother taught me magic.. All the things a queen might need.” Regina rolled her eyes lightly “I hated every minute of it.. not so much the magic, but everything else. I would rather go riding in the forest. Something my mother did not approve of.”

“I was out riding, when Snow’s horse came bolting past mine. I don’t know if my mother put a spell on it, I wouldn’t put it past her. But I had nothing to do with it” She looked at him, hoping to see some sort of sign, that he did believe her. But she couldn’t interpret the look on his face. Regina could only tell that it wasn’t disbelief or hatred. “I managed to catch up to her and get her over on my horse, before she fell off hers. At the time I had no idea who she was. My mother had been telling me, that the king was passing through the area where we lived. But I hadn’t thought much of it. It wasn’t until the girl had told me her name, and I brought her back to her father, that I realized who she was. My mother was thrilled of course, I had finally done something right..” Regina sighed and shook her head. “When the king proposed, shortly after, I wanted to say no. I didn’t want to marry the king, he was old and being a queen was my mother’s dream, not mine. I dreamed of real romance. Of falling in love and living happily ever after – I was only 18 at the time, and maybe I was naive, but he was .. In his late 40’s I think. Far too old for me, I thought, and so did my father. But my mother was very persuasive and she did have some good points. Not that she needed to convince me, I didn’t have a choice in the matter, but my father did.. Anyway, she said that me marrying the king, could put an end to the bad blood between our families. It could bring peace and if I could give the king a son, I could raise him to be a better king than the current one and our kingdom could finally get some prosperity. They were all very good points and it seemed like a good idea. For everyone but me.” It was a time of her life, that Regina was glad was in the past. She tried not to think too much about it, as it had not been a happy time for her. There was a short break in her speech, before she continued, she could have looked up at Robin in this time, but she didn’t.

“We were married soon after that” Regina continued, her voice quiet, wishing she could just skip that part of the story, but come to think of it, it wasn’t any harder than the rest of the story was. “Suddenly I went from being .. just me, to being a queen, a wife, and the stepmother of a 8 year old girl.. And I tried, I really did try, to be a good wife and mother figure. But I was still a child myself and Snow..” Regina sighed, shaking her head, before she looked up at Robin. “She was so used to getting whatever she wanted. Her father never scolded her, not once. And whenever she was unhappy, he would give her something new and shiny, to distract her. The girl had more ponies than she could ever use. She thought that his presents meant love, but really it was just his way out of having to deal with the girl. It made her shallow and selfish, even at eight years old. We never got along, because I told her no, from time to time. And the king – Leopold.. “ Regina shook her head, shuddering at the thought, she should never have started that sentence. “We were married for four years before-“

“Wait a minute” Robin interrupted. “What about the king? What were you about to say?”

Unfortunately, she had made the mistake of saying that Robin could ask anything he wanted. That she would tell him everything. It was already coming back to bite her. With hesitation, she continued. “He was not a nice man and he never pretended to me. Not to me at least. Of course in public he acted as if he was kind and trustworthy. But in private he didn’t try as hard. I was a possession and he treated me as such.. And if I objected.. “ Regina trailed off with a light shrug.

“He hurt you?” When Regina looked up and met his eyes, they were filled with compassion. It wasn’t how she wanted him to believe her, but there wasn’t much she could do about that.

“Sometimes” she confirmed quietly, with a soft nod. It was a lie, it wasn’t just sometimes, it was often. But the way he meant ‘hurt’ was obviously, hit or slap. Not the other kinds of abuse that Leopold had been so fond of. Regina absentmindedly touched the scar over her lip. She could still remember, how he had sent her to the floor, as the back of his hand connected with her face and his ring cut into her skin. “I quickly learned, not to fight him and it … it got better” Another lie, but she didn’t need to embarrass herself, to make him believe her. What did it matter that Leopold had abused her, like he did? It didn’t matter to the story, not in her opinion. But as she looked up at Robin, if was clear, that he didn’t believe her. She never had been a good liar.

“We were married for four years” She continued, eager to move on from that topic. “When Leopold fell off his horse, when he was out hunting. It was a very unfortunate fall. He broke his neck. Again, I had nothing to do with it. But Snow was devastated. She knew I had learned magic from my mother and begged me to bring him back to her. I only knew one way to do something like that and I had never done it before. I wasn’t saddened by his passing, however, Snow’s pleading did get to me. But I still told her that I wouldn’t do it. She was as angry as I’ve ever seen her. She told me I might as well have killed him myself. I supposed that’s why she’s saying that I killed him.”

Robin leaned forward in his seat and stopped her from speaking. “You said Snow’s pleading got to you.. So why did you tell her no?”

“Because bringing him back, would mean taking the life of someone else. A life for a life. Snow was willing to do it, told me to kill one of the servants, she couldn’t care less. But I still said no. Not because I hated Leopold, I did, but Snow needed him. I would just never kill to save him. To me any of the servants were more worth saving than he was.” That might make her sound good, or it might make her sound really bad, for how much she hated Leopold. But with what he had done to her, how could she not?

Robin nodded slowly, as if he was weighing her words and whether or not he believed them. “What happened then?” He looked at her, gently urging her to continue.

“Snow was only 12 at the time. Although she acted like she was only 7 or 8, when she had one of her tantrums. Both I and the royal advisers agreed that she was too young to rule, so I ruled in her stead. A sort of steward, if you will. It was never meant to be permanent and I didn’t try to make it so. But I did use my time wisely. I tried to change things I wanted changed. Like.. the taxes or how much of a farmer’s grain was to be sent to the castle.. things like that. Being the ruler was new to me, but I listened to the advisers and I really did my best.”

“And the lover?”

Regina sighed. Of course Snow would make it seem as if Regina was smudging her father’s memory, by taking a lover. “It wasn’t like she might have made it sound.” She began, just wanting to underline that. “I met Daniel, a year or so, before Leopold died, when he was hired as the Master of horses. Which is just a posh way of saying head stable boy. He was kind to me, respectful, and we became friends very quickly. It didn’t take long before we fell in love. But we didn’t do anything, I didn’t let him. Not until a year after Leopold died. We waited two years, before I would even let him kiss me. There was nothing dishonorable in it. He loved me and I loved him.. Snow might have preferred it, if I was true to her father, for the rest of my life. But I knew that as soon as Snow was old enough to be queen, she would throw me out of the castle. My time at the castle was limited and I needed to keep living my life and Daniel was a big part of that.”

Robin nodded, looking understanding, that had to be a good sign.

“Since you have a son, I assume I won’t need to explain the pregnancy” Regina tried a smile and was glad to see Robin smile back at her.

“No, no you don’t”

“I never tried to push Snow out, or take the crown away from her. Although I have to admit, that the idea did sound like a good one. Snow did not get any less selfish as she grew older and when she found out that I was pregnant.. well, she didn’t take it very well. She knew that she was supposed to be queen and at 14, she thought that she was old enough. Unfortunately others agreed with her. Mostly the nobility, the ones I had robbed of money, in an attempt to make life easier for those less fortunate. Before I could do a lot about it, Snow had me forcibly removed from the throne and chased out of the castle. Fortunately, Daniel and my father came with me and we were able to return to my parents’ estate. But not for long. My mother didn’t like Daniel and she didn’t want us there. But it was not what got us thrown out. I was 7 months pregnant, when Snow took away my father’s title. She could never take away his name, but she could take his money. And when she did, my parents lost their estate. And according to my mother, they lost everything.” Regina thought that was a bit dramatic. “Daniel and I, were sure that that wouldn’t be the last we heard from Snow, so we went into hiding. We found a cottage in the mountains and lived a quiet life there, for 4 years.”

 

_“Henry!” Regina trotted through the snow, reaching halfway up her shin. They were about 2 months into the winter, but both Regina and Daniel had learned, that this far north and this far up the mountains, winters lasted much longer, than they did in the capital. But they were getting by so far._

_Regina_ _headed for the chopping block, as she could hear Daniel chopping wood. And as she thought, Henry was there, keeping his distance to the axe, as he picked up kindling and put it in a basket near by. “Henry, your bath is ready” Henry looked up from his work, smiling. “Okay mommy” The snow around the chopping block was trodden down, so Henry could get around. But Regina couldn’t imagine him being able to get through the snow between there and the cabin, without there being a path made for him. His 3 year old legs, just weren’t long enough. “We’re nearly done” Daniel said, checking that Henry was out of range, before he let the axe fall again. Regina walked over to Henry and helped him gather kindling, until Daniel thought he had chopped enough wood. He hoisted up the big basket of chopped wood, onto his back and led the way back to the cottage. Henry walked between them, in the beaten path and Regina came last, carrying the much smaller basket of kindling._

_Not long after, Henry was in his small wooden tub and was splashing water everywhere, including all over Regina. She didn’t mind much. The small cottage was nice and warm, from the wood burning away in the fireplace, while Daniel was making dinner. Stirring the pot, Daniel kept an eye on Henry, as he played the narrator to his latest adventure: A prince battling a dangerous sea monster. He had a way with words, Daniel, he could have been a scholar or a poet. Instead he used his talents to satisfy their son’s love for adventures._

_When Henry splashed Regina with another wave of, now lukewarm, water, Regina laughed and picked up a towel, before she picked Henry out of the tub and wrapped him in the fabric. “That’s enough splashing for one day, sea monster” Regina chuckled as she moved away from the tub, with Henry in her arms, before she started to dry him off. “But I’m the prince, not the monster, mommy” Henry giggled as Regina ruffled up his hair with the towel._

_“When you splash all the water on me, you’re the monster” She smiled, drying off his arms and tummy, as Daniel laughed from the fireplace. “And you’re not helping” Daniel just shrugged back at her. “I have no idea what you’re talking about, I’m very busy cooking.”_

_Lifting Henry, to rest him on her hip, Regina walked up to Daniel, grabbed his chin and turned his face to look at her. “I’ll deal with you later” To which Daniel raised an eyebrow at her, grinning from ear to ear. She shook her head at him, before giving his lips a light peck. “I have a sea monster to battle”_

_“But you’re not a prince mommy” Henry protested as Regina carried him to the bed, where she could lay him down and tickle him. “We’re just gonna have to ask your father to change the story” She laughed as her fingers danced over Henry’s tummy, making him wiggle, squirm and laugh._  

 

Regina smiled at the memories they had made in that cottage. Henry’s first steps, his first words, all those important moments of a child’s first years. “It was a lot less glamorous than I was used to. But we were so happy.” Her smile faded a bit, as she thought of the next part. “When Henry was four, Snow found us.. I don’t know what reasons she gave in the history books.. But to me she said it was about making sure that no offspring of mine, would ever try to steal her throne. She knew that the people loved the Lionhearts. And I guess she thought, if Henry stood by her, that the people would be more loyal to her. No matter what she might want to do. I guess she thought, that raising my son, would make him see her reasons and think they were the right ones. Snow and her husband, James, took Henry from us.” That part was more about the bad blood between their families, only fueled by Snow’s hate for her. At least in Snow’s mind, it was about who had the right to sit on the throne.

“It took us a year to locate him and come up with a plan to get him out. In the years I had been queen, I had won the hearts of many in the kingdom and that meant that I had people who wanted to help me get my son back. They were loyal, not just to me, but to my family. It was in this time that I found out, just how many people had remembered my great grandfather and had secretly carved our crest into furniture, or made banners, that were hidden in their homes. People who were waiting and praying for the day, when a lion would take back the throne. They offered to storm the castle, where they kept Henry, to get him back. But I said no. It was heavily guarded and it would cost lives. They were willing to do it, but I wasn’t. We found another way, and it worked. We got Henry back. But now Snow was on our tails again. To get her off our trail, we split up. Henry went with Daniel and we went into hiding separately. We exchanged encrypted letters, leaving them with people we trusted, but they were rare. I didn’t see Daniel again, before he came to me and told me that Snow had caught up to him and Henry. When she had taken Henry once again.”

Regina left out the part where Snow had caught up to her and dragged her back to her castle, where she imprisoned and tortured her. In an attempt to get her to tell Snow where Henry was. Regina never told her a word. She held out through all the painful things Snow made her face. And when Snow realized that she would never talk, she resulted to keeping her prisoner. Then there were far less guards around her and it was easier to get her out of there. Again, supporters of the Lionhearts came through and saved her. For a long while Regina recovered in one place, and that was where Daniel found her.

“We found him quicker this time and got him out too. But we still agreed that splitting up was the best way to go. People knew me, knew my face, and it was hard to know who to trust. Daniel was unknown and so was Henry, it was just safer that way. Two years went by and by the end, we stopped hearing from Snow or her knights, there were no raids we had to avoid, no patrols, no wanted posters – nothing. For a while we stayed cautious. We kept writing the encrypted letters, but when we didn’t hear anything, we started talking about meeting somewhere. It had been so long since I had seen Henry and I missed Daniel horribly. I knew it wasn’t safe, but we were only talking about one or two days. We had done it before, but not since the second time Henry was taken. It seemed safe.. but it wasn’t”

Regina remembered the day all too well. She never thought that she would be able to forget it.

 

_Their encrypted letters had seemingly gone through unnoticed. And when neither Regina nor Daniel had seen any of the royal guards for months, they thought that maybe they were finally free of them. Still, they used their usual level of utmost discretion as they planned to meet. Regina had gone ahead of the others, two weeks before they were supposed to meet. They had settled on a small cottage in a clearing in the most eastbound woods of the kingdom. It was run down and hardly ever used, so it seemed like the perfect place._

_Regina was pacing the floor of the small cottage, when the day finally arrived. She hadn’t seen her son or Daniel in so long, that time seemed to grow impossibly longer as she waited for them to arrive. When she heard the sound of horses approaching, she opened the door, but only ajar, so she could see who was arriving. When she saw Daniel and Henry, she didn’t give any thought to their safety. Instead she just ran towards them as Henry set off towards her with an excited call of “Mother!”. He had grown so much, since she saw him last and looked more and more like his father. And yet Regina still managed to lift him off of the ground and hug him closely to her. “My little prince” She smiled into his hair and showered him with kisses. Any other boy his age, would have cringed and tried to get away from such affection. But Henry stayed put, hugging her right back. Regina blamed it on the long span of time that had passed since they last saw each other. They were lucky if they saw each other twice a year and it was never for more than a few days. And that was before Henry had been taken a second time, they just didn’t want to risk his safety._

_Henry smelled of pine and horses. It was spring and she knew Daniel was taking advantage of the warmer weather to be on the move more often. It was safer that way. Regina breathed him in deeply, trying to savor the moment._

_“Don’t I get any of that?” Daniel asked as he stepped up to them. Regina was smiling, even before she looked up at him. Giving Henry one final kiss to the top of his head, she stepped away and jumped right into Daniel’s arms. He twirled her around a few times, as they both laughed, before he put her back down. “It’s good to see you, my love”_

_“And you” She smiled back, as they both leaned in to kiss. Being in his arms felt like coming home and feeling his lips against hers, made all the time of missing him and all the hurt of being apart, melt away. It had been a long time since they saw each other, so they might have gotten a bit carried away. Which was definitely noticed by Henry, if his protest of “Ewww” was anything to go by. But they didn’t let that stop them, although Regina was sure that Henry wasn’t looking at them anymore._

_What did stop them, was when Daniel suddenly jerked forward and went limp in her arms. Regina’s arms instinctively held on tight to him, to keep him upright. And that was when she saw the arrow sticking out from his back. For a moment it was like time stood still, as Regina fell to her knees, still holding on to Daniel, as the reality of the situation set in on her. “Daniel .. No, please” she whispered panic sat in on her, as she lay him down, on his side. This couldn’t be happening, they had been so careful. They had taken every precaution, not to be found. But as she looked up to see James and about half a dozen of his knights, it was quite clear what had happened._

_His eyes looked up at her in terror, as he struggled to breathe. Blood was rapidly pooling under him and a thin line of red made it’s way from his mouth and down his cheek, towards his ear. If the loss of blood didn’t kill him, he would end up choking on his own blood. “Stay with me – Daniel – Stay” he looked so scared, it was breaking her heart to watch, and yet she couldn’t look away. He grabbed for her hand and squeezed around the ring he had given her. Daniel couldn’t speak, he was running out of time, and yet he found a way to declare his love for her one last time. His action reminded her of their vows, as he intended. She nodded, understanding, as tears flooded her eyes “Always” she murmured, squeezing his hand in return. Daniel nodded to her, his eyes never leaving hers as he started sputter blood instead of breathing. Regina closed her eyes as it became too painful to watch._

_They had run out of luck and it had cost Daniel his life. When he stopped struggling and Regina opened her eyes again, his were lifelessly staring back at her, making it obvious that he was gone. Regina couldn’t help but stare at him, she knew what had happened, it was clear as day, but her brain had a hard time processing the information. How could he be gone, just like that? She was too chocked to notice the tears running down her cheeks, all she could do was stare at Daniel’s lifeless face. Seconds ago he had been smiling and kissing her and now he was just.. gone._

_She couldn’t breathe._

_“On your feet, Regina” The voice was strikingly familiar and one that she had expected after seeing James – Snow. Getting to her feet, while turning towards the voice, Regina conjured up a fireball in the palm of her hand, more than ready to throw it towards her._

_“Don’t even think about it” Snow warned, as Regina’s eyes landed on the sharp blade pressed against her son’s throat. Henry was backed up against Snow, held firmly in her grasp. Regina killed the fireball immediately. If there was anything that could make her roll over and play nice, it was threatening Henry._

_“Whatever you want, you didn’t need to kill Daniel to get it!” Regina growled, unable to keep her voice steady. The tears on Henry’s face weren’t helping. Snow had just killed his father, right in front of him. Anything else, Regina might have been able to forgive, but not that._

_“For now, stand still” Snow said, nodding to James, who then stepped up behind her. It took a lot of willpower, not to reach for the knife in her boot and stab James. But she couldn’t risk Henry, not for anything, not even revenge. James stepped up to her like it was the most casual thing he had ever done and slipped a black leather cuff on her wrist, before he took a firm hold of her arm. “harmless” He said, looking to Snow._

_“Perfect” Snow put away the knife and let go of Henry. “You’re going with James, Henry.. I have other plans for your mother” James wasn’t even keeping a hold of Regina anymore, so she tried to create another fireball, but found that her magic had disappeared. She tried to get the cuff off, but it was no use._

_Regina_ _felt a knife pressed into her back as Snow told her to “Get on the horse”_

_“At least give Henry a moment to say goodbye to his father” Regina bit back, there was nothing she could do to overpower Snow, not to mention the knights. But she hoped that with Snow’s own loss of her father, she would give her that much. “Alright – but don’t try anything.”_

_Regina_ _nodded as Snow gestured for James to let Henry go. The boy ran straight back into his mother’s arms, but this time there were no smiles. This wasn’t like the other times, this wasn’t something she could come back from. Daniel was gone and how was she ever going to get Henry back without him?_

_They sat down on either side of Daniel’s body. Regina broke the arrow, so that he could lie on his back. She kissed his forehead and closed his eyes, while Henry wept against his chest. Regina cried, but she knew that they didn’t have much time. Daniel would want Henry to be safe, that was always their first priority. Even grieving would have to come second. So while she leaned down to rest her head against Henry’s shoulder, she forced herself to talk through her desperate sobs. “I will find you.. No matter what, Henry.. I won’t let Snow keep you prisoner forever.. I promise.”_

_They stayed like that, until they were pulled apart. Their hands were tied and then Henry was dragged in one direction and Regina the other. This was not how it normally went, they didn’t take Regina or Daniel with them. What were they doing? The last time Snow had taken her anywhere, she had done things to her, that Regina would never tell anyone. She hadn’t even told Daniel. Panic set in, at the thought of going through something like that again, and because she didn’t know what else to do, she started to struggle. And when she did, Henry did too. “I will find you Henry! -  Don’t forget! - I love you!” Regina called after him, even when they put a bag over her head and put her on a horse. She kept calling for him and she heard him call back too. “I won’t forget – I’ll never forget – I love you!”_

 

Regina shook off the memories, with a shake of her head. Even though many years had passed, sometimes the pain still felt fresh. This was the first time she had told anyone how she lost Daniel, maybe that was why. “This time they killed Daniel, shot him in the back and then they took Henry in one direction, me in the other” she said, blinking away tears. That had been the last time she had seen Henry. With tears in his eyes and a broken heart. She didn’t even know what had become of him, only that he was dead now.

Regina had never told anyone about it. There hadn’t been anyone she could tell. She had never shared her loss or let anyone see how much it hurt her to lose him. But as a single tear slid down her cheek, she knew that she showed Robin. But she couldn’t make herself care. So what if he knew? Did it make any difference? She was still stuck here and it looked like she would be for a long time.

“They put me here and .. I don’t know what they did to Henry.. But I know that I didn’t kill him. Why would I have used 10 years to protect him, if I would kill him?” There were still tears in her eyes as she looked up at Robin.

Regina got up from her seat and started to slowly pace up and down the floor. Not because she felt the need to pace, but so she could turn her back to him for a second, and compose herself, just for a moment. Thinking back on that hellish day, brought back ghosts that always took a while to shake off. The look in Daniel’s eyes as he was dying, was just one of them. She missed him, so much, all the time, but especially in here. Here she didn’t have any other company than her thoughts, when Robin wasn’t around of course. And her thoughts were mainly based on memories and most of her good memories were either based on her father, Henry or Daniel. All of whom were now dead. It really was a wonder than she hadn’t lost her mind yet.

“Are you alright?” Robin asked, also getting to his feet. Regina still had her back to him, her arms crossed over her chest.

“No..” That was possibly the most honest Regina could be with him. She never liked to look weak, it was one thing her mother had kept nagging her about, that she actually had taken to heart. Looking weak was never a good thing. But right now Regina didn’t care.

She could hear him sigh from a mile away “Regina.” His steps approached her and even though, she knew he couldn’t touch her, she tensed up. “I’m sorry.. I didn’t mean to-“

“It’s fine .. you need to know. I want you to know the truth. It’s too late to change history, but at least you know and you won’t.. hate me” If he was going to visit her every night, it would make things a lot more comfortable, if he didn’t hate her.

“I don’t hate you”

Regina turned to face him. “You did.” It had been right there, in his eyes as he yelled all those accusations at her.

“Maybe.. “ He nodded quietly, looking at the floor. Regina supposed that he would never actually say, if it had been true, he was too kind for that. But she knew that he had, she knew the look he had had in his eyes. It just hurt to think that Snow could be ruining things for her, even now.

“But what was I supposed to think?.. Reading all those things and you didn’t want to share your past.. I couldn’t just dismiss it, when I hardly knew a thing about you.”

“I would have hoped you knew, that I wasn’t a heartless killer, even if I didn’t share my past. It’s not exactly a happy story. I should have the right to keep my past to myself”

He nodded again “You should.. I just – I wanted to break the curse you’re under and it seemed logical that finding out who you were, would be the first step to achieving that”

“You can’t break the curse, Robin .. no one can” It was noble of him to try, but there was no way. Only true love’s kiss, could undo her sleeping curse. Regina’s hope had been, that Henry would find her and set her free. But now this would definitely not happen. And the only other love she had ever had, was Daniel.

“There must be a way – something you haven’t thought about” Robin tried, taking a step towards her.

“There isn’t, I’ve had long enough to think about it. There is no way” She wouldn’t tell him about the way she knew, because it wouldn’t do any good. Regina liked Robin, but it wasn’t love and she was sure he felt the same. Even if she wasn’t so sure that he still liked her.

“Well.. times have changed, maybe a way have come up since you became the victim of this curse. I’m not giving up that easily” There was a light smile on his lips and a look of hope in his eyes, as she looked at him.

She knew that by now, Robin probably expected that it was Snow who put her under this curse. After what she had told him, it would be the obvious choice. But it wasn’t the truth. The truth was that she had done this to herself. Only she hadn’t known that she would end up in this dream hell. She had thought that time would pass in the blink of an eye, from the moment she went under the curse, until Henry woke her. But that hadn’t been the case. And Regina regretted what she had done. If she hadn’t done this, she could have been dead and gone a long time ago. She would be with Daniel and Henry, which was all she really wanted.

“It is your choice, if you want to waste your time” She knew he would come up empty-handed, it was only a matter of time, before he realized that too. 

“I wouldn’t call it a waste.. It’s all for a good cause”

“Aren’t there any other damsels you can go save?” Regina almost found herself wishing that there was, so he would give up his hopeless quest.

“No one that haunts my dreams, quite like you do” Robin smiled, stepping closer. He was close enough to reach now, looking down at her, right into her eyes. “I’m sorry I doubted you .. Won’t happen again” His tone was quiet, intimate, as he reached out for her. They both knew that nothing would come of that. But what Regina had not predicted, was how he stopped moving his hand, right before it should have collided with her arm. Her eyes stayed glued to his hand, as he held it there. She could still remember what it felt like to be touched, and she could almost imagine the heat from his hand, seeping through the fabric of her dress, soothing her aching heart. But only almost.

His hand started to fade, after a few moments and when she looked up, he was gone and she was alone again. Regina sighed as she walked back to the fire and sat down. She could only hope that the next night, wouldn’t be as painful. But for now there was a whole day of nothing, before she would have someone to talk to again.


End file.
